martijndegraaf1001

Reis naar Leven

Inertia – Day 640

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inertiaAnother theme surfaced, inertia, and in working with it similar points opened up. The memory of where I started to live as a point isn’t always really clear so I’ll just write ‘the memory’.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear that I won’t get things done/won’t do things that need to be done
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to access a memory where I lived inertia 
— I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as ‘not capable of coming into action by myself’
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to define myself as having a low self esteem
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe/feel that I have nothing to come forward with
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel that I better do nothing at all —
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I build up the emotional energy charge of enertia
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to build up the energy charge
I dissociate the energy from the memory. I walk through the energy breathing till it is no more
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself accessing the memory and/or building up the emotional charge of inertia. I see/realise/understand that I cannot change the past and that I don’t need not repeat the same as back then. Instead I forgive and correct 
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel depressed
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to access a memory where I feel depressed about myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realise/understand that I build up a emotional charge of depression
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to build up the emotional charge of depression where I feel I cannot take care of myself and get things done to support myself
I dissociate the charge from the memory and I walk through the charge breathing till it is no more
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself feel depressed about myself. I see/realize/understand that this is a play out from the past. Instead I breathe in the present moment and I direct myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to disgust myself so much that I don’t care to support myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to disgust myself even more because I don’t find the will to properly support myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that disgust isn’t able to change myself/that I’m not able to change myself with disgust
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to access a memory and build up an emotional charge of self-disgust
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that I build up the charge
I dissociate the charge from the memory and I walk through the charge breathing.
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself accessing the memory and/or building up the charge. I see/realize/understand that it is a play out from the past. Instead I breathe myself in the present moment and I direct myself.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to rather sleep than support myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to sleep to forget and to expect that when I wake up things might have changed and I begin fresh
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to access a memory where I build up an emotional charge of wanting to lose myself
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that I build up this charge
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself build up this emotional charge of wanting to lose myself
I dissociate the charge from the memory and I walk through the charge breathing till it is no more
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself wanting to lose myself in sleep. I see/realize/understand that there was just a believe that this is a solution. Instead I bring everything here and I see into me what needs attention and I take care of it/me.
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Auteur: martijndegraaf1001

I am currently in the process of re-creating myself from a selfish being into a participant of a group of individuals that works for what's best for life on Earth, which is what's best for all of us, because without life we have no existence. Desteni is the name of the expanding group. I am writing my Journey to Life blogs to deconstruct the patterns based on fear that I exist as and to share this, so anyone can see the process I am walking.

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