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Him, Her, You – Day 675

A situation where two people are partners and they speak with a thdownloadird person and one of them talks about their partner as ‘her’ resp. ‘him’. I watched this happening and I had a reaction where I even touched my body saying that I really disapprove of such behavior and that I changed it in myself and found a way to speak where I turn myself to my partner addressing her as ‘you’.
Why do I react so strongly? Here is a memory where my parents would have friends over, like six people and the conversation would stop and my mother would say about my father: “isn’t it a dear”?. And where nobody would know what to say and I felt that she degrades him while looking back I really do not know what she felt and what moved her to say that in that way. Let’s see what opens up more…
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel that my mother degrades my father by talking about him amongst friends as ifn he is an object
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel that my father is being treated as an object.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to judge my mother as being rude to my father
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to judge het for ‘placing people in an impossible situation by asking a question that nobody can answer, a. because nobody knows him that well and b. because she use the ‘isn’t’ expression which is highly suggestive as to point out that there’s only one answer possible: yes’.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that I am being rude for judging her
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that I place the people in an impossible situation within myself by thinking that she does that.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to become confused as to what she means because her question isn’t a question and her ‘’isn’t is meaning ‘is’ and nobody is saying anything
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to not see/realize/understand that I project my feeling awkward and embarrassed with the situation onto the others where I really cannot tell what they feel
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that my mother makes everyone feel awkward and embarrassed and to blame her for this
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to blame my mother for my feeling awkward and embarrassed
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to react to the words her and him in the discussion I watched
I simply didn’t know what everyone was meaning and feeling because I never asked tem. So I refrain myself from judgement and interpretation.


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‘Speaking means trouble’ Day 674

images“The more you speak the more you’ll get in trouble” says my mind to me. I’ll correct this.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that the more I speak, the more I get in trouble.
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself believing that the more I speak, the more I get in trouble. I see/realize/understand that believing is a function of me as mind. Instead I speak with care and consideration as to not create unnecessary consequences.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to believe that my words get me in trouble
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself believing that my words get me in trouble. I see/realize/understand that believing is a function of me as mind. Instead I chose my words to speak in a way that’s best for all. And when there’s unforeseen consequences I take responsibility.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to withhold myself from speaking freely
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself withholding myself from speaking. I see/realize/understand that I’m acting from a reaction in me as mind. Instead I stop my reaction and I see into me what it is that I want to express.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear that if I speak my mind I’ll get in trouble
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself fearing that if I speak my mind I’ll get in trouble. Instead I realize that my partner will use the information from my mind to assist and support me.
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel that I must chose my words very carefully or I will get in trouble
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself feeling that I must chose my words very carefully or I will get in trouble. Instead I chose my words carefully to make sure that what I express is exactly what I mean to convey
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear that my words will be questioned
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself fearing that my words will be questioned. Instead I realize that my partner will question my words to get more clarity and/or to assist and support me to get more clarity/insight
I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to feel very uncomfortable when my words are being questioned
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself feeling very uncomfortable when my words are being questioned. I see/realize/understand that this is a reaction in me as mind. Instead I stabilize myself in breath and I see into my words if anything needs correction till I stand clear within them.

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to give what I want to say in bits and pieces out of fear that the other person will lose themselves in an emotional reaction and misinterpret my words and judge me for what I say
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself giving what I want to say in bits and pieces out of fear that the other person will lose themselves in an emotional reaction and misinterpret my words and judge me for what I say Instead I give it in bits and pieces from a starting point of checking if another person gets the information

I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed myself to fear that I’ll lose my temper when another person would understand the words I speak in a different way than I meant them and to project this fear onto the other where I fear they will lose their temper listening to me.
I commit myself to stop and to breathe when and as I see myself fearing that I’ll lose my temper when another person would understand the words I speak in a different way than I meant them and to project this fear onto the other where I fear they will lose their temper listening to me. I see/realize/understand that fear and projection are mere functions of me as mind. Instead I take the projection back to self and I forgive myself that I’ve accepted and allowed to fear of losing my temper when someone else would understand my words differently than I mean them. Instead I make sure I am stable when I speak and and I stand by/as my words.